Monday, February 18, 2013

T-Minus 2 months

Everyone will think that this post should be a happy one. And it is, somewhat. However, the last week or two, I've been very...I don't know...down. I shouldn't be down, right? I should be on cloud 9, anticipating my big day. And I am. I seriously get giddy when I start to think and talk about it. But something is nagging me at the back of my mind.

I got to put my wedding dress on today, with my veil that my grandma made me. I need it (the dress) taken in. That's exciting! And my veil was perfect! I can wait for Chris to see me! Plus, I got to see the pics from my bestie Staci's wedding today, and it reminded me how much I can't wait for that day to be mine!

So why am I in such a funk? Why are little tiny things really bothering me? Everyone keeps telling me not to worry about stuff, and to just take the attitude "it's my day, I can do what I want". But it's proving rather hard. I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, but I also don't want to look back on this upcoming April day with any regrets. What to do...

Work is stressful too. My poor babes are going to be assessed 4 times this semester with high-stakes tests. Most will only get 3, but I have about 9 who will be assessed 4 times between now and the end of April. This makes teaching a testing grade so frustrating! When am I supposed to actually teach my kids? When can I let them take a break and not push them with test prep? I can't! Because our system believes that if my students can't pass a high-stakes test, then I shouldn't be a teacher. They don't account for the child's lifestyle. They don't account for whether or not my student may be starving or not rested or worried about where they might sleep tonight. All they want is data proving that these children are progressing at the rate that people, who have never spent one day inside a classroom, have determined they should progress at. Friends, please take education seriously. Teachers do the very best they can with this extremely flawed and NONWORKING system.

Ok, that rant made me feel a bit better. I'm going to try better at not being so blah.

I can assure everyone that I had the very best time possible on Saturday! I am so thankful that I have such wonderful friends who care so much about me to do this! THANK YOU! I really want to display my banner in my classroom! :) And I already broke out my Ninja blender because, well, I couldn't wait! It makes THE BEST smoothies possible! NO LUMPS!!!

I always promise to make more updates, but we all know I come up so very short to this promise. But I'm hoping my next post will be much more brighter! Maybe even include some pics! Laters!